Just hear me out. That's all I'm asking. Just sit quietly and listen with an open mind, please babay. I'll never speak to you again after this if that's what you want but please just think about this.
Look at these pictures and remember when we took them and how happy you were. Keep in mind that nothing you do or say can hurt me so don't bother trying to deny our happiness because I won't believe you for a second. Just look and think about how great of a relationship it was. Now look at us, and not just us, your relationships with everybody who has gotten close to you. They fall apart honey, they fall apart because you push them away. You push or you let your rage take over or you do something foolish.
You are not a stupid man. You are smart and funny and strong and you have a huge heart. Now listen closely please; you need to get help with the PTSD.
It's a problem honey. You're letting it sabotage your life. Here's what I think happened this time: You were lonely while I was gone, then there was that fight at the bar with John. You had to rush him to the hospital with blood everywhere, right? And now you're living right next to him. Baby you deployed with him. You're putting yourself right back in Iraq without realizing it.
And you want to deploy again but because of the medical issues lingering from last time you can't. You can't do the physical stuff you want to, you can't fight again like you want to, you feel like less of a man because of all this. It's depression honey.
Add in that we were happy. We were baby, we had an excellent relationship and nothing will ever make me forget or regret that. But it's over and it doesn't help with the depression.
You're being destructive. To yourself and others and I'd do anything for it to stop. Please talk to somebody. I'm begging you. You're angry all the time, you're miserable baby. I'm not trying to get us back together, I just want you to be happy. You deserve happiness, even if it's not with me. I want so badly to help you through this and I'll be there for you every step of the way if you want me, but please just get help with this. I'm hearing form every side that I need to walk away and let you do your own thing and hope that one day you grow out of it, but I just can't do it. I know that you can't help someone who won't help themselves, but I think that for a little while I did. The you that I fell in love with is the real you, and I want him back for good.
